Just before we traveled to bring our Little A home an acquaintance innocently said, ‘how wonderful you get to enjoy all the joys of pregnancy without developing any stretch marks.” There was much innocence in those words yet they stung. The scab on my wounded heart and womb was ripped off. Exposing yet another raw and gaping wound left as the result of secondary infertility.
Although I did not physically carry Annalise in my womb and my body does not show the physical signs of pregnancy I walked an almost 4 year journey to this precious daughter of ours. I have stretch marks. Deep, ugly, penetrating stretch marks.
Stretch marks cover my marriage, my parenting, my friendships, my faith. There are plenty of them, crisscrossing over one another. Some deep, red and sore, others faint, pale, barely there. Yes, I have stretch marks. Beautiful representations of growth, faith, and resilience.
Today marks our one year anniversary of being home as a family of 4.
One year...12 months... 365 days. What a year it has been!
9 months of sleepless nights, more specialists and doctor appointments than I can count, physical therapy, occupational therapy, speech therapy, laughter, growth, tears, tantrums, a fractured ankle, AFOs, break-throughs and breakdowns.
I don't know that I can fully express in words all that we have been through in the past year with our precious Little A. She has brought so much joy to our family. She has left an indelible mark on so many lives. She has changed us for the better. She has challenged us. She has stretched us.
The stretch marks that I bore prior to bringing Little A home are still there but others have been formed as well. Stretch marks of flexibility, learning to lay down my wants or expectations for what was/is best for our daughters. Stretch marks of understanding (and sometimes a lack of understanding), stretch marks of triumphs and stretch marks of failures.
I am thankful for the stretch marks that this past year has brought and so very thankful for the beautiful, amazing little girl who has caused them.
No comments:
Post a Comment